Oh! My Mood
tranquility of early morning smiling leaves with shining dew dancing with cool breeze the agile,chirping birds, flying high making the most of the new sunshine bells ringing from the place of worship,nearby my non-controversial mood as pleasant as the first morning tea, a big thank you God for the fresh new day 9'o clock sun rays entering my balcony,unopposed as if it must pass through this gateway before it goes to world tilting the scale of my mood, anxiety,reticence setting in. a zig-zag mood graph of workplace, a disproportionate happiness, sadness,fullness,emptiness, a cocktail of moods, short lived bubbles evaporating with each depleting work hour! evening music cool winds kids playing ,carefree i play with my octogenarian mother oh my mood! now irritable,next romantic then gloomy ,now happy,excited my inscrutable mood swings! are they, i wonder the results of, my reacting to situations my neurotransmitter or my sleep intake effects of color,music,light my jealousy,my hatred or paranoia my pains and aloneness or someone's else sourced to me, an aura of guilt shrinking being me! my realization of equanimity of present,past,future or meditation,paving the way for Nirvana, i don't know inexplicable for me my moods are "me" good or bad, as varied as rich as my beliefs,values,dreams. Kamakhya Image credit : Google
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the long,
never ending looking road,
a reinforced perception,
that it goes on..
a mirage
a blurred vision,
for it has an end,
the crossroads and junctions
reaching the inaccessible terrain of dead ends
tired traveler of life,
en route upheavals,potholes
oscillating between ups and downs,
survival of fittest
and manifestation of 'I' syndromes.
the stopovers and signals,
on the way,
suggesting in low voice,
to slow a bit down,
falling on deaf conscious.
frightened mortals,
see the falling down of ripen fruits,
dry leafs off the trees on the road side.
at the fag end of journey
or days before that
he thought
why he ran after the matter,estates
why he soured relationship,
inflicted pains,
invested in ego
fell short of loving the co-travelers on the way
why years passed,
under the influence of delusion
and attachments,
all alone, tears of remorse
falling down silently, looking at the open sky,
the only source of strength and hope now
while on the run,
he thought,
why being in a hurry
still a long way to go ...
a paradoxical journey,
the purpose of life
the eternal bliss,liberation from recurring pains,
safely buried under the distractions of ignorance!
the eternal light,
be the guide all along the way,
before the day light,
the twilight,
meet the nightfall!
Kamakhya
Image Credit: Google
rustle bustle of life,
fullness,emptiness..
and 'in betweens'of daily chores..
the travel,
the workloads,
the long calls or web engagements
the lift,
the dine out,
the groceries,
the socialization,
the responsibilities,
the wave of solitude,
the mood swings,
the trials and tribulations,
from Good Morning to Good Night...
routine repeats..
and opportunities of goodness lost,
everyday!
still,
a pat on liftman's shoulder,
and a happy spark in his face,
for all to see!
a sweet smile for the laundry man,
or the security guard,
...a world of joy, in the air
a little time
for the unknown octogenarian lady,
a stream of blessings,simply to feel..
a generous tip,
a hand holding for crossing the road,
a caring word,
a loving gaze or/and little food,
to those unprivileged...
men women animals or plants!
love breeds love,
happiness infects the world,
care for others means saving for a future,
being cared for!
the art of reading their hearts,
the science of spreading happiness quotient,
and the contentment within!
by the way..
who you made happy today?
Kamakhya
Image Credit: Google
the decisions
already taken,
to return a smile
or not
to talk a little more
or not
to show the empathy or not
to make feel the love or not
to be 'the you' or not,
predetermined exhibitions,
dictated by the pride
of anything,something,wrong thing
or the inhibitions
for the fear of loosing the worth,
overvaluing the net worth!
heart made of quartz
or potholes in heart
the layers of ego fear complexity,
even goodness, all in the subconscious,
having turned into a knot
by this time now
the agents to unfasten,
the insight and the perseverance,
inhabiting
in the lumber room of ignorance
if ego can go to the mortuary
if pride can go for a walk
the freesia of humility and love
can walk into the lives!
Kamakhya
Image credit: Google
Yes,
i do remember
what you had said
' time heals
and it will'
not that
i never tried to sleep
the whole night conversation
with the self
somehow continued for long
with the depleting candle of time
by my bedside
between the last fag end of nightfall,
sinking darkness
and arrival of early morning light,
cruising ahead of darkness,
the aurora
promised me dreams
only to be
nullified by sunup!
Kamakhya
Image credit : Google
serenity and solitude,
sorround me,
the sounds of bush cricket,
the dead dry leaves,
the breeze driven branches,
the dark night and growling,
or sounds of cuckoo,
butterfly and bees...
.. my companions.
i see my growing,
graduating from bud to flower,
my blooming and dying alone!
no body to endear!
never to be enamoured!
like some of you in the plains,
with your own people,
as good as without them!
alone, overlooked,not appreciated,
for who you are!
but then God knows,
what is best for me or you,
in the wild or in the plains!
Kamakhya
Image Credit : Google
