Reflections

It  was  not possible
to  move  ahead 
or  go  back
The  wavering  statues
were  flying in the blue sky,
invited
uninvited
and were waiting sometimes,
at  the  crossroads of mind,
in the  city  of  heart,
for  the serpentine river of past,
for the melting away of ices
in to tears!


If you had told once then,
I would have tied up
with a rope
that biased  mind,
would have requested
the autumn
the sun
the moon,
to wait  a  little,
would have added
little  more  fuel
to  the  dying depleting lamp!


The characters of
black  and  white days,
most often  now a days,
knock my doors,
while sleeping,
eyes closed but heart open.
They say..
' I  see  bad dreams'.
but  i  love  to
walk around
with a lantern and stick in my hand,
from my intrinsic original nature
to  my  professed  acts,
from   lashing  rains
to  flowing  tears, heartaches
from  festivity  of  vices 
to  the  dream  of  Nirvana,
from  hopes  of  life 
to  ignoring  the  death,
from  best kept  secrets 
to  always  propagating  lies!


@ Kamakhya

Image credit:https://unsplash.com

# Throwback

There was no way to go,

either go back

or move ahead.

The statues kept flying

in the cool blue sky ,

descending down

to appear before me intermittently

at the crossroads,

lanes, by lanes, traffic junctions !

The iceberg in heart

had started melting ,

the trumpet of being helpless

had already blown, with wrinkles.

There were no expectations

to get anything.

Do you know?

If you had told at least once then,

I could have caged

my wavering mind and heart ,

I could have added

little more fuel to a depleting lamp !

They say…

‘ I talk a lot in sleep.

But i just love to walk around,

on the streets i visited once,

with a lantern in my hand,

from lashing rains to flowing tears

from blushes to knoll of hatred,

from storms to lighthouses

from vices to self-proclaimed virtues , way to Nirvana

from crowd to solitude

from useless loquacity and lies

to best kept secrets and truths !

I just search , dissect

the years gone by

I just build

rebuild, break

the earthen dolls of past !

I just count

recount

the life’s earnings !

Kamakhya





Do you know?

Do you know?

failures and rejections

are scattered around

the floor of my house

and I still

collect

preserve

those broken pieces of mirror,

obsolete coins,

handful of mists,

in half-broken

half-full heart

in the midnight?

Someone, a black shadow

standing still

behind the drapery,

unmoved

reticent.

I sometimes long

to find a vibrant soul ,

a talking parrot,

an unseasonal stream of love

from the shadow

overenthusiastically

but amidst

rains of tears

cyclone of heartache

and darkness of failed fantasies,

nothing is seen or heard

in the soundless post midnight?

Do you know ?

the questions

needing soothing answers,

ironically, go on to present

more and more new questions,

smokes of crackers,

thick black clouds

and a battlefield

of anxieties, despair,

a secluded long serpentine road ahead?

@ Kamakhya

Image credit : Maru Lombardo


			

The Distant Sky

The  crowd  
did not evidence  
anyone,  to be called 
very  own ! 
don't  know  why? 
there  was  no cool shade 
under the banyan tree
what was there  was 
heatwave  and  rejection 
there were no sounds 
of  love  and  equanimity!

The river where it was earlier, 
now a barren land 
the jungle 
now  a city of jealousy!
don't  know 
whether I am there or not 
where I used to be?  

The person evading death 
in the name of waiting 
for it, 
doesn't  know yet
what to search 
when or where to search!
standing still 
or  consciously  unconscious, 
he himself 
in his own hands 
makes  a  disturbed, 
unsatisfied  soul 
fly away 
to  a  distant sky, 
to an uncertain realm! 

@Kamakhya 




Lighthouse

is-7

dark night sailing 
in the violent sea
sharks of ego 
and 'me and my benefits' boundary wall
pirates of peace
tides of pain and rejection
shivering winds of malnourished hearts
a sense of complete incompleteness
consciously unconscious!
everything in the middle of larynx
difficult to shallow
the whitewashed wall will show
the cracks of unperceived truth
today or tomorrow 
the crescendo of misery 
unbearable now
roadblocks of fear
fear of being a maverick! 
thank God 
sighted is a lighthouse!
emitting the light of Almighty
rays of universal love
overdrive is looking inward
did we?   



Kamakhya 

Image credit: Google 
   

Half Love

The sea beach 
and the marching waves,
excited,nervous 
oblivious of hitting where
castles are built,
rebuilt in the pinkish air
exhilaration rules 
the adrenaline,
jasmine enamours everywhere.
Waves but return 
cracks appear in mirror 
or patches in cracks,
sort of unknown virus 
retreating warmth
subtle but sure,
to dreams,halfway 
en route the failed fantasies.
Silences amidst commotion,
in the day 
or midnights solitary soliloquy,
with moments of mementos
tired tears 
like a defeated heart.
Half empty 
or half full
who will do the litmus test
now? 
The picturesque garden of autumn,
had an entry,
exit gate too,
everything happens 
for a reason,
predestined 
preordained?
may be.

Photo credit:pixels.com

Kamakhya 



What you say !

is-12

as i embraced the new winter
under the blanket
still awake
eyes half closed
and began my soliloquy
searching solace from nostalgia,
you came on to the stage
en route the blanket
to sing the lullaby for me
when i longed for hearing your voice,
you sat still
like a silent freesia
i wanted to tell you
how the bench near the sea beach
laughing at me 
how the still hibiscus
sympathizing with me
how the photo frame on the wall,
accusing me
i wanted to tell you
how i missed the full moon
or even the thin crescent
after the fortnight of darkness
What you say 
say something now,
Please

Kamakhya


Image Credit: Google 




   
 



Why should you

images (1)

the moon light may play

hide and seek,

hiding behind the black clouds

why should you?

the soundless sound

and the aura of emptiness

may have managed to stay back

in my room or  the foyer,

the loneliness and pains

may have lied to be okay,

beneath a brave posture

why should you?

people may say and forget

what they had said,

the crowd may misunderstand

the congestion in my heart,

the logjam of uneasinesses

or the obscure silence , in between

why should you?

the snowfall

might have buried everything,

under its way,

covering the beautiful mementos,

en route

why should you?

Kamakhya

Image credit : Google

Rejoinder

Silent was the sun
except the sunbeams and brightness 
it scattered,  during the day 
why the fickle moon raising 
so many questions needing emphatic 
answers in the midnight!

Between the scorching heat and 
uneasy moonlit late night,
sandwiched is the failed fantasy 
like the half-burnt wood 
simmering with last remnants of hot ashes.
Questions never stopped gate-crashing
but who will give pacifying matching answers
when mystery reigns in the wintry night,
acute uneasinesses rules the mind
severe pain pierces the heart 
and paradoxes fill the air?
The fragrance of sweet Jasmine 
and the cool breeze,outside,
are trying their best to palliate things, consolating en route a distraction 
but why it can't be from the sources it is needed most? 
if not now in the moonlit night 
then at least in the new morning? 


Kamakhya 

Voice 2

The voices ,
Samaritan voices ,
Pristine , conscience enamoured,
at times did appear ,
radiating the abrupt spark
waving their hands from a distance,
feeble ,slow, inconsequential though ,
insinuating what to do
or not do ,
to be little kinder
little more compassionate empathetic
to love a little more ,
to others around
but only to be suppressed
by the aura of ego self-indulgence.
‘ I ‘ and ‘ why I ‘
being the circumventing force ,
the spoilers to the rainbow
or the fear of being a maverick!
butchered rationality,
even could not cry
before being buried
under the heaps of materialism,
core primitive voices
once again orphaned ,
left to strangulate themselves.
All the wisdom now inaccessible,
the goodness propaganda
already hiding some where,
deaf and dumb.
Stark ignorance amidst erudition,
is not embracing the simple truth:
All are one
and one is in All .


Kamakhya


Image Credit : Pixabay